Gaga, banana flies and guildlove

Posted: November 5, 2011 in Just me
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Sometimes I am a Sad Panda

I love my family, but…sometimes they drive me crazy! While Tribeca never got the Headless Horseman mount (sob!), I have bought myself my own mount, a new car. Today I have been driving my dad here and there most of the day, picking him up after an operation and helping him do groceries since obviously the medications made him struggle  to see the difference between tomato and lime. To avoid potential disasters in kitchen I came to rescue. Any average nice person with a driving licence would be happy to do the same.

Mine. Just mine. NOT a taxi!

So when I got home after dark, all I really wanted to do was to deal with the invasion going on in my kitchen. You see, I have, oh the horror, banana flies! I left a banana in my gym bag and kinda forgot about it. And when I opened it a cloud of horrible little creatures flew up and stormed perfectly synchronised into the kitchen, starting nomnoming on everything! Disgusting. Google tells me all I need to do is put out some wine and they will drown in it. Hello? First they eat my banana, then occupy my kitchen and on top of that I’m supposed to serve them wine? Forget it! A similar-to-Martha Stuart lady on a random website tells me vinegar will do the same. So I have now placed little cups of  that smelly stuff all over kitchen, waiting for them to suffer and die, die die! So far…. 2 dead. 89679 to go!

I was just about to put on an overall combined with bee keeper mask and go get the fire extinguisher, to see how banana monsters enjoyed large amounts of CO2 sprayed onto their tiny bodies, when my phone started acting aggressive, ringing over and over again, making me abort the progress and answer.My little sister. Calling me while putting on large amounts of blue mascara.

“Can you drive me to Grünerløkka (=very cool place for very cool people in Oslo, obviously not for me!) in 10 min?”
“No, sorry”
“Why? What are you doing?” Definitely not going to answer that, even family must think I have something better to do than play Lord of the Flies on a Saturday night.
“Just… relaxing, I have been out driving all day. I don’t want to go out again. And you live 200 meters away from the bus stop!”
“Fine!!! I knew you wouldn’t do it, bye!”
“….”

Then, 5 seconds after my mum calls, trying to make me feel bad by telling me how many girls being attacked in the streets of Oslo lately and that couldn’t I do my little sister this favour? I was on the edge of saying fine, ok I’ll do it but then my evil side kicked in and told me to stop being nice for once. And told them there is no bloody taxi sign on my car, neither a “available 24/7” sign above my head. Just because  I live alone and don’t have any plans does NOT make me a pusover. Have fun taking the bus, byeeee! And it felt good but also made me a bit sad. So, while considering going back to the flies who were probably lol’ing and showing me the finger in the kitchen, I saw a mail ticking in from one of my guildies. It was the sweetest screenshot ever, and only said “for you”. Totally made all angry and sad thoughts go away and made me smile from ear to ear. Going to have a glass of  cold white wine and relax for rest of the evening. And I won’t feel bad for a millisecond!

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Comments
  1. Dennis says:

    I don’t know Elise. You should know better… keeping bananas in your gymbag yuk!

    Ps: do you ever wonder where they even come from? Were their eggs in the banana all along? So do we actually always eat them? or do they just appear out of thin air? BAH!

    • Anonymous says:

      You know Dennis, they lay eggs inside the banana, in the banana peel! And if you leave it too long they come all popping out and starts to fly and multiply faster than we wipe on Baleroc hc and they are all over ready to ATTACK you! 😦

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